Mithril Spike 1999
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Current Standings
Player of the Year Standings
1999 Mithiril Spike Matches
Week of February 14, 2000
Ron: Good evening Blood
Bowl Fans, I'm Ron Valdez.
Pat: And I'm Pat Boom.
Ron: Lets get you caught
up on all the action from this week.
Marcus' Marauders
vs Verministers
Ron: When the Marauders
started out the season, the managed to strike fear into the hearts of every
living player in the league. They did this by devastating the Forty
Miners in their season opener.
Pat: That's right Ron.
Equipment manager controversy aside, the Marauders managed to clear the
field of every last Dwarf at one point in the match.
Ron: The Marauders went on to win that match 2 -
0. However, the team seems to have fallen into an immediate slump
after such a promising beginning, losing every subsequent match.
With the Mithril Spike semi finals just around the corner, could the Marauders
maintain their current standings with the other teams in the league coming
up fast? Coach Marcus II has been putting the team through the paces
with some serious EXTRA TRAINING. We take you now the the opening
kick of the match. We see The Mummy of Love sporting his newly acquired
MAGIC
HELMET lining up against the Verministers newly acquired power house
Headsplitter.
Pat: With Vulrus on
the injured reserve, this was a much needed purchase for the Verministers.
Ron: As the Verministers
were set to receive the kick off, a pitch invasion like no other occurred.
Pat: We're used to seeing
fans flood onto the field from the stands. But fans of the Marauders
are so hard-core they must have, well, buried themselves in the field sometime
earlier. Decomposing fan after decomposing fan rose up from the ground
and mobbed the unsuspecting Verminister players. We see in the slow-mo
Dolous of the Verministers getting pulled underground by at least a dozen
fans. We wouldn't see him again till after the game. Needless
to say he was pretty shaken up.
Ron: Even with two other
Skaven stunned on the ground for the opening moments of play, the notorious
speed of the Verministers was still a threat. Taking the ball all
the way down field nearly scoring a first blood touchdown. But the
Marauders would have none of that, stopping the Verministers rush a mere
4 paces from the end zone. However, old problems would continue to
plague the Marauders in this match. In the closing moments of the
first half, the Marauders failed to score on three separate attempts.
Two of which, #5 Brook just plain fell down and dropped the ball as he
entered the end zone.
Pat: Even though the
Marauders have been plagued this entire season by lack of scoring, they
continue to make up for it in the "smacking the opponent around" category.
While the ball was being batted around near the end zone, the Verministers
were being batted around in the midfield. 5 Skaven were all knocked
out, including Headsplitter who would not be fit for play for the rest
of the match. Also complicating matters for the Verministers, #9
Battue got himself thrown out of the match for laying in a nasty foul on
#10 Cat Fish. That would spell serious trouble for the Verministers
in the second half as the Verministers would only get 1 of their 6 knocked
out players back. Cat Fish was diagnosed with a PINCHED NERVE
which even the infamous regenerative ability of the Marauders wouldn't
be able to shake.
Ron: We take you now
to the second half. With the Verministers kicking the to Marauders,
another hard-core Marauder fan threw his own skull onto the field taking
out Longo.
Pat: Out numbered 11
to 5, the Marauders slowly marched down field for a touchdown. In
the process, they completely cleared the field of every last Skaven.
Ron: Things went from
bad to worse for the Verministers as they were down to just 3 able bodied
Skaven to receive the kick. And if the Marauders' fans did not already
have an over bearing impact on the game, another fan threw what appeared
to be femur onto the field clocking Nox right on the noggin.
Pat: Any ordinary team
would have given up at this point, but the Verministers once again introduced
the Marauders to their lightning quick speed and agility running the ball
within 9 paces of the end zone.
Ron: However, with one
last gasp of a phenomenal 3 pace leap by Clysm to bring him within 6 paces
of the end zone, the Marauders converged and smothered the last hope the
Verministers had. Your final score Marcus' Marauders 1, the Verministers
0.
Forty Miners vs Zero
Line Gravity Dwellers
Ron: In the beginning of
the season, the Forty Miners were put in the odd position of having several
players injured. In their season opener against the Marauders, the
Miners had 5 casualties on the day and at one point had all of their players
cleared off the field. In game 2 against the Verministers they suffered
3 casualties from the speedy, yet at the time under strengthed, Skaven
team. It seemed that legendary ruggedness of the Dwarven players
had some how evaporated. Then, late last week, news broke that the
Miners had fired their equipment manager sighting extreme negligence as
the reason for termination.
Pat: Actually Ron, I
heard that the Dwarven equipment manager was shaved and left out in the
middle of Middenheim after game 2. That's more than just a simple
slap on the wrist!
Ron: With a new equipment
manager, the Miners managed to only suffer one injury in their match against
the Zero Line Gravity Dwellers.
Pat: That's right Ron,
and I hear Maxim Spikehelm will be just fine for his next match.
However, Alphatek of the Dwellers will be missing his next game while nursing
a Gouged Eye.
Ron: The Miners/Dwellers
match was marked by a surprising number of completions, with the Xavier
Thorn having two completions on the day.
Pat: The improved equipment
care appears to have helped the Miner's passing confidence as well!
#2 for the miners had a completion on the day, pretty gutsy move for a
Dwarven team!
Ron: While the Miners
came close to scoring, an unfortunate illegal procedure came late in the
first half to keep the Miners scoreless in this match. Minor discipline
issues on the field aside, the Miners look like they are ready to turn
the corner.
Pat: But talk about
a team that has come out of nowhere and has shaken up the league, the Dwellers
pull off a 1 - 0 win today placing themselves in fourth place knocking
out the highly favored Verministers from their playoff berth.
Orcland Raiders vs MHT
Ron: We take you now to
Talabheim and Frankie Lightning who called the play by play for the Cabalvision
coverage of the Raiders/MHT match.
Frankie: Thanks Ron.
Today we were witness to a collision of the 2 most dominate teams in the
league; The Orcland Raiders and MHT. MHT has found a perfect blend
of strength and speed. MHT has managed to excel in one of the most
vital aspects of the game: ball control. The Raiders are all about
smash mouth, brutal play. How would this match turn out? In
the first half we witness the overbearing defense of the Raiders completely
shut down the MHT offense. At one point, the Raiders managed to spring
the ball free from Jimmy "The Hand" and begin their own. However,
Gurk Krudd Chucker was in for a bit of a surprise as he entered the MHT
half of the pitch. We see here in a slow-mo replay Gurk falling into
a well disguised pit. A few moments later, he comes flying up into
the air screaming like a stuck pig! Just look at the expression on
his face in the replay..."wot du?". Grot came crashing to the ground
killing the Raiders drive in the first half. However, the Raiders
would receive the ball to start the second half, and that's when the stitch
in time breaks the camels back...
Ron: "Stitch in time
breaks the camel's back"? Huh? What does that mean?
Frankie: It means disaster
for MHT. In the second half the Raiders managed to rack up 4 casualties
including killing #9 Head-Deer-Lights. The Raiders marched down field
bringing scoring the first touchdown in of the day. Additionally,
the Raiders knocked out the Mighty Zug taking him out for the rest of the
match. From the point, the Raiders managed to recover the ball after
kicking to MHT. However, due to down right undisciplined Orcy play,
the Raiders get nailed for an illegal procedure right before scoring a
second touch down at the end of the match. Your final score Raiders
1, MHT 0.
Ron: Frankie, I want
to get your opinion on the Verministers/Zero Line Gravity Dwellers situation.
Frankie: Not that I
have anything against the Dwellers, they are a hell of a team with a lot
youth and potential, but I think it's an absolute crime that the Verministers
will be missing out on the Spike finals. I think its an affront to
the game that a loud mouthed coach like Agnamemnoz just happens to have
a very lucky team in the Raiders making it to the finals were as the Verministers,
a well oiled, disciplined team will be missing out. The Raiders total
lack of discipline and out and out mental lapses will cost them in the
finals, mark my word!
Pat: Lucky? The
Raiders are one of the most physically imposing teams? Sure, like
any Orc team, they sometimes become defocused. But coach Agnamemnoz
has been has done a terrific job of keep the Raiders undefeated streak
alive.
Frankie: This from a
guy whose only Blood Bowl experience is 1 match were he spent the entire
match running around screaming "They're trying to eat me!" Sorry
Pat, the Raiders were lousy bumbs when I used to play them in the old NAF.
Now they are lucky lousy bumbs! Maybe if you had spent more of your
Blood Bowl career on the pitch and less time riding the pine eating pastries
you'd realize this.
Pat: Um...
Ron: ...moving on to
our next match...
Skrypt Kiddies
vs Oxa's Regulators
Ron: In our final match
of the day we saw the Skrypt Kiddies take on Oxa's Regulators...
Pat: ...I can't believe
he said that...
Ron: The Skrypt Kiddies
have been in a recovery mode since their second game of the season...
Pat: ...I was in two
matches not one...
Ron: The Regulators
have also seen their share of problems at the start of this season...
Pat: ...I was only running
around screaming in one of them...
Ron: Pat...
Pat: ...and that Minotaur
was trying to eat me...
Ron: Pat?
Pat: ...they do that
sometimes in matches ya know...
Ron: PAT!
Pat: ...huh?
Ron: Can we just call
the match, please? With both teams hungry for a win, but cautious
about taking more casualties, we were set for a rather interesting match.
Pat: The key to this
match for the Regulators was the combination of Glymdring, Xip, and Xap,
combining for 3 completions and 1 touchdown on the day. And don't
expect them the Regulators to stick to a finesse game, they managed to
put Ogar and Amit out of the game with some seriously physical play.
Ron: Fortunately for
the Skrypt Kiddies, Ogar and Amit were the only casualties on the day,
I have been informed that we will see them back in action next match.
Pat: The highlight of
the match for me was when D'Koy of the Regulators mistook a dummy filled
with rather unstable gas for one of the Kiddies' Linemen. This block
had rather explosive results for D'Koy.
Ron: Fortunately for
both teams, no long term damage was done. Your final score in the
match: the Skrypt Kiddies 0, Oxa's Regulators 2.
Ron: That's all for this
week, join us next time for our coverage of the Mithril Spike semi-finals
Spike Semi Finals
Ron: Welcome again Blood
Bowl fans, I'm Ron Valdez
Pat: And I'm Pat Boom
Ron: This week we bring
you Mithril Spike semi-final coverage.
Pat: Later today we
will be brining you the surprise match up between top rated MHT and the
cinderella team of the Zero Line Gravity Dwellers. They really came
out of no where and took to league by storm Ron!
Ron: That's right Pat.
But first we bring you the match up of two teams that have been brutalizing
the league this season: The Orcland Raiders vs Marcus' Marauders
Orcland Raiders
vs Marcus' Marauders
Ron: What can be said about
the Raiders that hasn't already been said? You can some up their
game this season with one word, domination!
Pat: That's right Ron.
Contraty to what other so called "Journalists" claim, the Raiders have
found a winning combination in maximizing their brute for physical play
while exploiting mistakes and weaknesses in their opposition.
Ron: And squaring off
against them today is a team that shares many of the same brutal playing
tactics. The one major difference between these teams is scoring.
Pat: That's right Ron.
The Marauders have been able to pummel their opponents into to pitch.
But when it comes to the all mighty TD, the Marauders just seem to come
short when they've really needed it. For the Maruaders to win today,
they need to score early and then shut down the Raiders offense.
Ron: Let's go to the
kick-off. We have the Raiders lining up preparing to kick to the
Marauders.
Pat: The Raiders line
up comes as no suprise here as coach Agnamenoz has Geargrinder flanked
by Da Rock and Da Brick right in the middle of the line of scrimmage.
Ron: And the Marauders
meet power with power lining up The Mummy of Love and Steel Head right
up with the Raiders power line.
Pat: And there's the
kick.
Ron: Brook runs back
to get the ball. In the middle The Mummy of Love and Geargrinder
and laying in some serious blows to each other. Drakenborg runs wide
with Golden running interference for him. The Raiders Rocknar and
Rotbreath run up to challenge Drakenborg. Back in the middle the
Marauders are forming up the cage.
Pat: Looks like their
going for the Funeral March down the middle of the field. But its
unusual for Drakenborg not to be part of the front line Ron.
Ron: It sure is Pat.
The Raiders are starting to break through the cage. In the wide zone,
Golden has just taken a vicioius hit from Rocknar.
Pat: That leaves Drakenborg
alone to face Rocknar and Rotbreath.
Ron: Drakenborg is in
huge pile up with Rocknar and Rotbreath. They seem to have him tied
up pretty well at the moment. Back in the middle Zike has come in
and broken the cage open on the side. He's got ahold of Golden!
The balls popped loose!
Pat: The Raiders' fans
are going nuts! Their team has managed to pop the ball loose before
the Marauders could even make it past mid field.
Ron: The Raiders and
Marauders and in a mad scramble to get the ball. Neither team seem
sto be able to get control at this point, the ball is being batted farther
and farther into Marauder territory. And Bull Head has the ball!
It's not every day you seem a zombie come up with the ball in the middle
of a pile up like this!
Pat: Of course it did
practly bounce up into his hands.
...
Ron: With time ticking
away in the first half, the Marauders are still trying to battle
their way out of their end. In the wide zone, Drakenborg has managed
to break fream from Rocknar and Rotbreath. Drakenborg is making a
mad dash to the endzone. Brook takes the hand off, he's making a
run up the middle dodging through the Orc line. Skullhack and Snots
attempt to double back and cover Drakenborg.
Pat: Are the Marauders
doing what I think they're doing?
Ron: It looks like it
Pat! Brook launches the pass to the double covered Drakenborg.
It's on the numbers! Drakenborg breaks two tackles his heading to
the endzone with no one to stop him. What? Drakenborg has disappeared
into the field!
Pat: I see what's going
on. The Raiders seem to have borrowed a dirty trick that was used
on them by MHT last week.
Ron: You're right Pat,
Drakenborg has fallen into a well disguised bit on the field. He's
coming back out, fast!
Pat: Yup, just like
last week, the old "Trampoline in the Pit" trap.
Ron: Drakenborg has
been flung into the crowd. Ouch! He is getting absolutely mauled
by these rabid Raiders' fans. The fans toss the ball back on the
field. Skullhack recorvers the throw in and makes a run down field.
Pat: Not enough time,
the horn sounds signaling the end of the first half. Those Raiders'
fans are still roughing up Drakenborg something fierce! I wonder
if coach Marcus II is going to be able to get him back in the lineup for
the second half?
...
Ron: We are about to
start the second half. Our Khemri reporter Jewel Denile has been
trying to get information about Drakenborg's condition. Jewel?
Jewel: Yes Ron, the
word from the Maruaders locker room is that Drakenborg will be out of action
for the rest of this match. However, he is expected to make a full
recovery in the next few days.
Ron: Jewel what condition
is he in right now?
Jewel: It seems a majority
of the Raiders' fans have brought everything from holy water, to garlic,
to wooden stakes to this match. Fortunately Raider's fans don't know
much about anatomy as they managed to stake Drakenborg through every part
of his body except his heart. Back to you Ron.
Ron: Thanks Jewel.
Due to technical difficulties, we will not be
brining you the rest of the play by play for the 1999 Mithril Spike tournament.
Here are the results from the Semi-Finals and Finals:
Orcland Raiders 1 - Marcus Marauders 0
Zero Line Gravity Dwellers 3 - MHT 2
Spike Finals
Orcland Raiders 1 - Zero Line Gravity Dwellers
0
Player of the Year: Grot Skullhack